A Different World - POEM

© 2011 Sandra Stolnik ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Good evening!!

Here's a new poem. It's published in my book, though I put it on my photo from hospital to give you a visual input as well :) 

2010 I got my cochlear implant and the first few days with this new technology inside my ear was wicked :D, confusing and really tough to adjust but I made it and I made a speedy recovery although everything sounded so strange in the first few months. However, day by day my hearing got better and then all of a sudden it got normal, back to what it was before, ... before I had my hearing loss, when I knew what's like to hear "normal" with a hearing aid.

I cannot describe it but, so much has changed since then and yes music is heavenly!!! I can hear it and it does sound so natural and I hear all the various tones which I haven't heard before. I can live a normal life again and even the big battery adjustment I accepted. I have to change batteries every 3 days and take two of those little "button batteries", you know those little ones.

Before that .. a hearing aid could work for a whole week and you only needed one tiny battery... At present I don't mind it. I always have a reservoir of batteries at home and in almost every back and jacket too, just to make sure ;)

I am SO HAPPY I took notes & wrote poems. Time's passing by so fast and without all the notes I wouldn't remember everything, every detail like this poem describes my first experience with my new hearing. (The car sound) :)

Enjoy it! I'm sorry for the long post. Thanks for reading this far, it means you care to read. :)

Stone Deaf Ear - POEM

I never knew how to locate sound,

Or to tell from where it came.

It always gave me shivers

I never liked this children’s game.

To turn left or to turn right?

I never knew which way to go.

Always heard some stupid laughter.

Making fun of me? I didn’t know.

Since the day I was born,

Silence was my company.

It was like a second layer

That did not want to leave me.

Can you revive my stone deaf ear,

Can you give it the sound back?

Can you unite my two ears,

So they can walk together this track?

By Sandra Stolnik

August 2, 2011 

Here's one of my poems about my ear. You can find more of my poems on youtube. Just search for "mytruestory85". I wrote this poem last summer, when I just began to hear with my new cochlear implant. Everything was new to me at that time but soon I began to notice positive changes, though still... I still had something I was longing for... to be bilateral, to hear on both ears. My RIGHT ear is still deaf & even to this present moment now, I still do not hear on that other ear.. but only on my left one.

Some people say "it's enough, you already have one hearing ear." Yes I do but why can I not be bilateral? I enjoy being deaf too. It has a lot of advantages that you begin to appreciate now. I am both hearing and deaf!! This reminds me of another poem I'll post soon.

In secret I hope for an internal failure with my device so that perhaps when that moment comes I can be implanted on both ears at the same time, risking only once another anesthesia. :P

We'll see what will happen in the future, but I better not wish such scenarios to happen because for half a year or so, I have noticed minimal first signs of a possible failure. It doesn't have to mean that something is wrong but sometimes I notice for a fraction of a second that my device stops working and then it's "on" again as if nothing happened before. The same feeling as if you take away that magnet from your head and stick it back, as soon as the magnet touches the other magnet which is under your skin you hear again, when they are not close together you don't.

This is weird but I'll pay attention to it further and see if there will be bigger changes that will affect my hearing.

I hope you enjoyed reading my poem!

Your Poetry Girl :)